2023—what a f*cked-up year! I mean, so many major changes took place in my life. The latest? I was released from my contract job, ugh! It would be so easy for me to drown my sorrows in a glass of Crown Royal, and I almost did. But guess what? I poured it out! Yes, I wasted liquor—fight me! I looked at that glass, and a voice said to me that I didn’t need it. I then bumped (loudly) Kendrick Lamar’s Alright and vibed to André 3000’s new album, New Blue Sun, which put me in quite the meditative space. What do I do when life gives me lemons? I make lemonade through self-reflection and a dose of positive psychology.
I’m currently completing a course in positive psychology, and I must admit that taking this course at this time has been extremely helpful with managing the challenges that have come my way. What is positive psychology? It is the scientific study of what makes life worth living. We’re so used to viewing mental health through a disease lens that most people have no idea that positive psychology is a thing. It can be confused with new age concepts and practices, but it is so much more. Moving through this course has really helped me to maintain my thankfulness for what I do have in my life rather than focusing on what I don’t have.
Conscious-centered living and positive psychology are closely related. Both try to improve people’s health and happiness, help them grow as people, and help them live a worthwhile life. Well-being, mindfulness, intentionality, personal growth, good relationships, and a whole-person view of life are important in both approaches. Positive psychology studies what makes people happy and healthy, while conscious-centered living means making decisions that are in line with your own values. Both of these approaches stress how important it is to develop your strengths and build good relationships. Positive psychology ideas can be put into practice in conscious-centered living, which helps people make decisions that make their lives happier, more fulfilling, and more meaningful. Following is my process for dealing with life’s challenges using positive psychology and a conscious-centered perspective.
Sit with my feelings.
When I received the call about my job, I cried nonstop for at least 15 minutes. I’ve been with the company for 4 years, and they really felt like family. Plus, I loved my job! 100% telework, working solo, creating my own workflow, and expending as little or as much energy as I wanted to. My time was my time to do as I wished, and I loved that freedom. Now, I have to find another way to earn money. I may have to return to the office, I may have to begin commuting again, and I will have to go through the interview process repeatedly. The thought of it makes me cringe. I never realized how much I took my remote work setup for granted until now. The idea of going back to a traditional office environment feels suffocating. It’s hard to imagine starting over and adjusting to a new routine after being so comfortable in my previous position for so long. The uncertainty of what the future holds is daunting, but I don’t worry about it. I know that The Divine through the universe is abundant and provides; I will be okay. I remain optimistic and hopeful that I will find a new opportunity that will bring me the same sense of fulfillment and satisfaction.
This is a chance for me to explore new possibilities. Is returning to the office my only option? How can I leverage my talents for income? What lucrative remote job opportunities exist? It’s 2024, and people are making money in many non-conventional ways. Content creation via writing or YouTube—I want to tap into that, but it takes time to build up. I could also look into freelance work in graphic design or web development. The possibilities are endless, and I need to remind myself that I have the skills and determination to succeed in a new venture. Even amidst this difficult time, I am grateful for that. It’s a scary thought to step out of my comfort zone, but the potential rewards are worth the risk. I just need to stay positive and keep exploring all the options available to me in this rapidly changing job market. Even when the storms come, the sky above the clouds is still blue.
There are so many feelings I’m having about this next challenge that, when sadness and crying come, I let them happen without judgement from myself or others. It’s important to practice self-compassion and self-kindness during challenging times. When it’s time to get myself together, I will. I remind myself that it’s okay to feel overwhelmed and uncertain about the future. It’s natural to have doubts and fears when stepping into the unknown. But I also know that I possess the strength and determination to navigate this new path. I will continue to explore different opportunities and push myself out of my comfort zone to discover my true potential. I trust that with perseverance and resilience, I can create a successful and fulfilling career for myself, whether it be through content creation or another avenue.
Reflect on and listen to my higher self.
There’s always been this voice inside of me that pulls me out of any dark, low place I find myself. It’s the voice that doesn’t allow me to cry and sulk for long. It’s the voice that starts flooding my head with plans and ideas. It’s the voice that motivates me to keep pushing and reminds me I’m that Queen! That voice is my higher self, God, The Divine, The Most High, The Creator, Source; pick whichever works for you; they’re all the same. I am thankful I have the ears to hear when that voice speaks, and that voice helps me transform these lemons into something that benefits my reality.
The theme of 2024 for me has been self-discovery. Almost everything and everyone close to me has been stripped away, and I’m beginning to understand that this is to make room for greater. Change is a natural part of life, and transitions are normal. The seasons change four times a year; everything in nature happens in cycles. Our lives reflect that consistent change. Who am I? What do I want? Those are the questions I must answer without distraction. I have learned to embrace solitude and silence, using it as a time for introspection and growth. It is in these moments of stillness that I am able to truly listen to that inner voice and follow its guidance. I am beginning to see that the challenges and losses I have faced are not obstacles, but opportunities for me to redefine myself and my path.
But my higher self has a lot of competition in my headspace. Judgement, anxious attachment, and sadness reside there as well; depression is always looming to take over, waiting for its turn. Sometimes the chatter is too much, and most times when that happens, thankfully my higher self reigns all the chatter in. You may laugh because that sounds a little crazy, right? It’s okay; I’ll be crazy to you. But I’ve been meeting with the lady, as we like to say, every week since June, and she has helped me immensely through all of these transitions. I’m not ashamed to say I need therapy; I wish more people would seek it! As I continue on this journey of self-discovery, I am confident that I will emerge stronger, wiser, and more aligned with my true purpose.
Self-care is important.
In these challenging times, self-care has become extremely important in helping me cope. It lowers the negative effects of stress on health, builds emotional strength, keeps the mind clear and cognitively functioning, protects relationships, stops burnout, boosts a sense of control, and promotes a better lifestyle. Taking care of myself on a regular basis helps me deal with stress, keeps my mental health in good shape, and creates a positive setting for dealing with challenges. It also helps me make better choices and form healthy habits. I’m not tempted to drown my sorrows or boredom in a gallon of chocolate ice cream!
Self-care activities like deep breathing, meditation, and being aware are very important for lowering stress, making your mind clearer, and making it easier to control your emotions. These activities help relax the body and mind and make you more aware of yourself. Mindfulness, on the other hand, makes you aware of your thoughts, feelings, and surroundings without judging them. This makes you emotionally healthier. Yoga helps me with practicing mindfulness.
Setting boundaries and sticking to them is important for self-respect and healthy relationships because it helps protect your physical, emotional, and mental space. It means saying “no” when you need to, putting yourself first, and making sure that other people’s needs don’t get in the way of your own health. Those who genuinely care for you will respect your boundaries, while others may need guidance on understanding them.
Regular physical activity is good for the mind and body because it lowers the chance of chronic diseases, boosts energy, improves mood, and sharpens the mind. Moderate exercises, like walking or cycling, can be very good for your health. My problem with working out, however, is being motivated; that is a work in progress. But I try to be diligent about what I eat to support my physical health.
Also, doing things that make you happy is an important part of self-care because they are good for you and give you a break from the stress of everyday life. These days, I am very unapologetic about how and with whom I spend my time. I do what I want; that’s how a Queen moves! I have learned to prioritize my own happiness and well-being above all else. Whether it’s going for a massage, reading a good book, or spending time with loved ones, I make sure to do things that bring me joy. It’s all about finding that balance between taking care of yourself physically and mentally. And as I continue on this journey of self-care and self-love, I am becoming more in tune with what my body and mind need to thrive. Life is too short to not prioritize your own well-being, and I am learning to embrace that fully.
When I need it, getting help from friends, family, or experts gives me emotional, practical, and financial support. Having a strong support system is essential to maintaining a healthy and balanced lifestyle. Whether it’s seeking advice from a loved one, getting a helping hand with daily tasks, or receiving guidance from a professional, reaching out for assistance is a sign of strength, not weakness. By surrounding myself with positive influences and being open to receiving help when needed, I am able to navigate life’s challenges with confidence and resilience.
Prioritize and move into action!
Positive psychology and conscious-centered living can help you deal with tough times by giving you tools that not only help you handle stress but also help you grow and be healthier. The following techniques help me maintain my focus and mental state as I continue to look for employment while prioritizing my content creation:
- To-do lists can help you feel more competent and successful, which are important parts of positive psychology. Getting things off the list can give you a sense of growth and accomplishment, which can boost your motivation and self-esteem. Making to-do lists helps you be more aware and deliberate. It helps you focus on the present and organize your thoughts and duties, which can make you feel less stressed and give you more direction and purpose.
- In positive psychology, setting goals that can be reached is very important because it gives people a sense of purpose and direction. Setting goals helps you stay focused, find the steps that will help you make real progress, and feel fulfilled. A plan of action shows that you have thought about your choices and priorities. It signifies a commitment to purposeful living and ensuring that your choices reflect your core values and objectives, especially during challenging times.
- Breaking problems down into smaller jobs can make them seem less scary and more doable, which can lower stress and boost the chances of success. This method fits with the idea in positive psychology that you should build on small successes to feel more capable and strong. This method reinforces the importance of mindfulness by encouraging concentration on one task at a time, promoting a clearer and more focused approach to problem-solving. It lets you focus and be more aware of each job, which helps you solve problems better and feel more satisfied.
- Learning how to solve problems is an important part of adaptable coping and resilience, which are two of the main ideas in positive psychology. Engaging in brainstorming solutions, evaluating advantages and disadvantages, and seeking input can lead to innovative problem-solving approaches, enhance confidence, and foster a sense of control. Taking proactive and deliberate steps to address life’s challenges aligns with the principles of conscious-centered living, emphasizing the importance of intentional and values-driven problem-solving. To use problem-solving methods, you need to be aware of your actions, carefully consider what’s going on, and make choices that are in line with your values and goals.
You can basically use the good things about positive psychology and conscious-centered living in these techniques to turn problems into chances to grow and be happy. Navigating challenging times with resilience and purpose is achievable by maintaining awareness, making deliberate choices, and acting decisively.
Conclusion
This post discusses how I manage challenges in my life. By incorporating the principles of positive psychology and conscious-centered living into my daily life, I have been able to navigate difficult situations with a sense of empowerment and resilience. It is important to remember that everyone’s journey is unique, so it is essential to experiment with different coping strategies to find what truly works for you. Embracing challenges as opportunities for growth and happiness is key to overcoming obstacles and living a fulfilling life. By shifting my mindset and focusing on personal growth, I have been able to approach the challenge of losing my job with a sense of curiosity and optimism about other interests. This has allowed me to learn from setbacks and continue moving forward with confidence. I have found solace in exploring new hobbies and career paths, which has opened up exciting opportunities I never would have considered before. By staying open-minded and adaptable, I have been able to navigate through this difficult time with grace and resilience. Each day presents a new chance to learn and grow, and I am grateful for the lessons I have gained from this experience. I am confident that I will emerge from this challenge stronger and more resilient than ever before.
Sources Used Here and Further Study:
You CAN Stay Strong, Sane & Centered in Times of Stress. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-integrationist/201609/you-can-stay-strong-sane-centered-in-times-stress
8 Effective Ways to Cope with Life Transitions: A Psychologist’s Advice. https://copepsychology.com/8-ways-to-cope-with-life-transitions/
Healthy Coping Skills for Uncomfortable Emotions: Emotion-Focused and Problem-Focused Strategies. https://www.verywellmind.com/forty-healthy-coping-skills-4586742
Healthy Coping: 24 Mechanisms & Skills For Positive Coping. https://positivepsychology.com/coping/
8 Ways to Cope With Life Transitions: Here’s a psychologist’s advice. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-addiction-connection/202312/8-ways-to-cope-with-life-transitions
“The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle – This book is a guide to spiritual enlightenment, emphasizing the importance of living in the present moment and freeing oneself from mental and emotional pain. It’s considered a fundamental text in the realm of conscious-centered living.
“Man’s Search for Meaning” by Viktor E. Frankl – Frankl’s book combines his experiences as a concentration camp inmate during World War II with his insights as a neurologist and psychiatrist. He introduces the concept of logotherapy, which asserts that striving to find meaning in life is the most powerful motivational force in humans.
“The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” by Stephen R. Covey – Covey’s book is a seminal work in the field of personal development and leadership. It emphasizes principles like proactivity, beginning with the end in mind, and synergizing, which align with the concept of intentional and conscious-centered living.
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